Connecting With Your Wounded Inner Child
Updated: Mar 16
Let's start with the basics ....
What do we mean when we speak about the inner child?
The term “inner child” doesn’t refer to the part of your brain that is reserved for having childish thoughts!
Rather, the inner child exists as the childlike aspect within your unconscious mind. It reflects the child we once were, in both her “positive” and “negative” aspects.
Our unmet needs and suppressed childhood emotions, as well as our childlike innocence, natural enthusiasm, and creativity, are all waiting within us.
The repressed emotions refer to all of the things you were taught as a child not to feel if you wanted to receive love. The result: you were only offered attention when you obeyed.
It’s almost inevitable that this happens when parents, education, and society impose rules and standards to help socialize us into becoming functioning human beings. In fact, it’s good that this happens. Constraints are required in order to understand boundaries and grow as human beings.
However, the result is that the inner child within you still holds onto the sadness, anger, and trauma that resulted from feeling rejected.
Simple examples of things we learn from our upbringing that result in feelings of rejection are as follows:
“You’d better not say what you really think”,
“Don’t try to get that promotion because you aren’t smart enough”,
“Sex is bad” and
“You need to make your parents happy.”
Connecting with the inner child focuses on bringing these feelings to the light of your consciousness so that you can find the root causes of the challenges you’re facing as an adult.
A quick note about Carl Jung, the originator of the term.
Carl Jung was a renowned psychology expert who founded many theories about personality, identity, and analytical psychology.
His work has been studied the world over, and today, many of his theories and suggestions for improving one’s life are still used widely.
Jung is reported to have originated the term “inner child” with the “divine child archetype”. It’s used as a concept to explore our challenges growing up and developing our personalities.
In this sense, the “inner child” stays within us, forming a part of our consciousness as images. This has an impact on how we interact with the outside world.
The “inner child” is an autonomous and hidden form deep within. It’s transformed when given expression.
So how do you know if your past trauma is affecting you deeply right now? Is it connected to your inner child?
These are some signs that you may have a wounded inner child:
You feel that there is something wrong with you, in the deepest parts of yourself.
You experience anxiety when going out of your comfort zone.
You’re a people-pleaser.
You don’t have a strong sense of identity.
You deliberately like being in conflict with people around you.
You’re a hoarder of things, emotions, people, and you have a hard time letting go.
You feel inadequate as a man or a woman.
You constantly criticize yourself for your supposed inadequacy.
You’re unforgiving to yourself, rigid and a perfectionist.
You have a hard time committing and trusting.
You have deep abandonment issues and would cling to relationships, even when they are toxic.
There are many more signs that your inner child may be wounded. Truthfully, all of us, no matter how small or insignificant, have traumas from our past that need addressing.
That's where RTT comes in.
RTT allows us to reveal and peel back the layers of what events, things and issues from our childhood are still affecting our lives today ... and most of it is happening at the subconscious level
“Inner child work is the process of contacting, understanding, embracing and healing your inner child. Your inner child represents your first original self that entered into this world; it contains your capacity to experience wonder, joy, innocence, sensitivity and playfulness.”
When you can form this reconnection to your inner child through RTT work, it allows you to access the fragmented parts of yourself so that you can discover the root of your phobias, fears, insecurities, and self-sabotaging inclinations.
Instead of simply finding and looking at the symptoms of your pain, inner child healing will help you go right to the core and reveal when your issues began and deal with it effectively.
We cannot heal what we don't feel and that understanding gives us the most liberating transformative power to fully let go all that has held us back, all that has kept us down.